Mark by Mark Zuckerberg
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Bathrobe

Bathrobe
When we used to wear suits to work, organizational hierarchy was indicated through the price of your suit. The boss wore Armani, and Biff dug through the bargain bin. So how can you communicate corporate prestige in a 21st century world that wears jeans to work? Well, Mark goes with the bathrobe, the trump card of casual business wear. Because nothing says “I’m a really successful twenty-somethin and my mother still does my laundry” like that fading bathrobe in your closet. Bathrobes are no longer just for showerers and streakers: so tie one on and go to work, Biff! $32

Elastic Jeans

Elastic Jeans
Reinvent your lower half with a pair of Mark’s favorite elastic waisted denim pants which Mark has often referred to as “The future of Jeans”. Belts themselves are too static, and fastening the belt is overly complex; the next generation of consumers will want clothing – along with interpersonal communication – to be as simple and as seamless as possible. Marks solution? Jeans that you put on like sweatpants. So slip some on. $46

A Sweet TIe

A Sweet TIe
Believe it or not, ties are a crucial part of Mark’s wardrobe. In fact, Mark once wore a tie to work e’ery day for a full calendar year. But Mark wasn’t thinking like most tie-wearers trying to convey takeaways of professionalism, trustworthiness, and business sex appeal- he was working with the humbled mindset of local Houston moving company Square Cow." Mark wore his tie ironically; he wore it because people thought he couldn’t; he wore it not because it fit his style, but because it seemed so implausible around his neck. Sometimes fashion is counterintuitive – and in this case it certainly is. So grab yourself a tie and finally show the world just how wrong for ties you really are. $95

The Randi

The Randi
For all the ladies in the place with style and Zuckerberg taste. A v-neck perfect for all ex-directors of fbook marketing. $17

Plain White Socks

Plain White Socks
A good sock is one that resembles the man wearing it. And Mark's Hanes whites are certainly "good" socks in this sense. Both Mark and his chosen socks are characteristically plain and lumpy, and though they are universally considered as such, are still both financially successful as shit. So if you want to dress like Mark, be sure to start at the bottom, begin with the socks. $6

Adidas Flip-Flops

Adidas Flip-Flops
With Facebook, Mark forever altered our norms of privacy: our information is now public, our break-ups broadcasted, and our drunken shamings eternalized- even our Houston mobile dog groomer knows our secrets. But Mark believes that his new definition of privacy extends to our feet as well; Mark wears Adidas flip-flops to work every day, so that he can “share” his toes – and he thinks that you should too. But if you don’t want your feet to be shared you’re out of luck, because considering Mark’s record with user data, he’ll most likely just share them for you.

Mark by Mark Zuckerberg tee

Mark by Mark Zuckerberg tee
Sometimes in fashion the brand itself is what’s most important. Lead the pack from the chest. $23

The Goldman Sack

The Goldman Sack
Consider the purpose of a bag, of a sack: we most often use sacks to carry many individual objects in the form of just one object – we want to represent and encapsulate many distinct entities into one vehicle…. You should definitely get yours – for as Goldman Sachs certainly knows, grouping individual objects as one has all kinds of wild benefits and will allow you to circumvent all sorts of annoying obstacles. Everything is justgoing in the trash anyways, even if you aren't looking to rent construction dumpster Atlanta. Just be sure to let only your richest, I mean, most prized possessions into your sack!
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